MO MOMMIES, NO PROBLEMS
We planned a girls night out and I showed up, ready to rally, excited for this "two week in the making" plan. One martini in, and I was already nodding out at the table. Both of my friends felt so bad for me, "Jennie, go home, we know you want to be with us but you can't even keep your eyes open." No no no, I can HANG guys, just because I'm a mom, on very little sleep and exhausted, I can still keep up. I'm staying out. Before leaving to go to a bar, I used the bathroom, washed my hands and returned to the table. We headed to a bar, I lasted about 20 more minutes before I basically fell asleep in the booth and my friends literally kicked me out and put me in an uber. So much for "mama's first night out."
I got home, washed up, took off my rings, and realized that three of my rings were gone. Two wedding bands that I wear stacked with a ring my mom gave me when I was in the throes of infertility. She gave me a blue sapphire band, the sapphires were from a family heirloom and my mom made it into this ring. It was my good luck charm that my mom said I could have until my baby was in my arms. Once I had Tess, my mom asked for the ring back, I gave it back, and two weeks later I told her I needed the ring again because Tess was having gas issues and I was convinced having the ring back would bring us good luck. Basically, I told her the ring needed to be mine until further notice, she begrudgingly obliged. Now, the ring was gone. I woke my husband up. I told him "this is a symbol of me not being able to keep it all together, I'm a new mom who can't hang with my friends and I'm the disheveled version of the mom I thought I would be and I'm failing at all of it." (it was more of a self deprecating tirade but I'll spare you all.) He helped me call the restaurant, the parking garage in case I dropped it in his car, the bar, and the uber driver who took me home. No one had it.
I woke up this morning and I felt sick to my stomach about these lost rings. I couldn't shake it. They were valuable, yes, but more so, it was the meaning behind them. My marriage and my good luck charm that brought Tess into this world, were just gone. I decided to give it an in person attempt at finding the rings, and so I went to every place I could think of to find them. The parking garage, searched the car, went to the bar, nothing. I finally went to the restaurant and told one of the bus boys my story and asked if we can look at the video cameras. He said he'd have to get back to me once the owner came in tomorrow (she wasn't around today because it was President's Day). As I'm about to walk out, in walked Naomi, the owner. Instead of introducing myself and telling her what happened, I just said, you're a woman, maybe you're a mom, but I'm a new mom and I'm losing it. I'm exhausted, I came here last night to have a relaxing night and I lost my rings. I lost them because I think I took them off like I always do after I wash my hands, I take them off, place them down to dry and then put them back on. (since pregnancy, my hands got swollen and I swear never went back to normal, some people say their feet grow a size during pregnancy and stay that way, that happened with my hands). Except this time, I was so tired that I forgot to put them back on. I told her how I had trouble having a baby and one of the rings helped make me a mom. In between my sob story, I remember asking her once or twice "are you a mom?" to which she just nodded. 20-30 minutes later, after looking everywhere, floors, bathroom, calling waitresses, bartenders, I turned to her and said "where do you wash the napkins, maybe it's in the washing machine?!" and she told me its a long shot, they send out their linens to an outside company. She saw my disappointment and said "but I'll call Rob! and we'll give it a shot." I overheard her on the phone saying "I feel so bad for this girl, she has a really awful story, and these rings meant a lot to her, we need to find them."
At this point I walked into the restaurant bathroom one more time, to try to back track my steps. I was kneeling down, cheek almost to the bathroom floor when I heard Naomi say "JENNIE HE FOUND THEM!" as she ran into the bathroom. She saw me cover my mouth and scream of happiness, to which she then said "you're going to make me cry" and she did. We hugged. I spewed obscene thank you's and I love you's (I'm sure I said I love you lol). We exchanged numbers, I said I had to find a way to repay her and the linen company. She said she'd call when he came to drop off the rings.
5 hours later, Naomi calls me. I told her my husband would come pick up the rings and then I asked her how old her child was. I said I work with moms and children for a living and I want to get your child something. She replied "I'm a mom but I don't have my own children, I raised my sister's son, he's my nephew but he's like my own. I actually can't have my own children and my marriage ended because of it." This was why my story resonated with her because she also had trouble conceiving. These lost rings brought us to one another, and we hung up the phone saying "friends for life." I know this all sounds insanely cheesy, but I'm forever moved because of this story, because of the career I've chosen and because of the way that becoming a mom unites every woman, whether you have your own biological children, are trying to have a child, or actually give birth to your own. Had I not opened up to this woman about what I had gone through, she may never have tried this hard to get these rings back for me.
The end of the story goes like this: Matt, my husband, goes to pick up my rings at the restaurant, he shows up and abc news is there filming him. My husband has no social media, is not one for spotlight and he immediately said "no no no, not me, not on TV, BUT you can come to our apartment two blocks away and film my wife and baby!" He called me and said "you have 10 minutes to get dressed, get Tess in a cute outfit and clean up the apartment." The end result, abc news channel 7 crashing our bedtime routine :)
MO MOMMIES, NO PROBLEMS.
News story here.